We're a spoiled, lazy culture, full of ethnic pride that has to have a parade for every nationality.

If they [peple] really hate you, that means you're doing something right.

You try not to have a favorite when you have sons or kids. Can't have a favorite. Can't let them know know if you do. I don't. I treat my main son and the other two exactly the same way.

Once I saw a homeless man wearing his underwear on top of his pants. Now we say, why don't the homeless just go out and get a job? If he's wearing his underwear on top of his pants, I doubt his resume is in order, and I don't think he's going to make it too far in the interview process. In fact, I'm pretty sure that McDonald's has a no underwear over your pant policy.

Why do we need another station where everyone has a gun? We already have BET.

You're gonna check my computer records? Is that important? I don't think the government needs to know how I feel about teen Asian sluts in order to fight terrorism.

If I drive my SUV I'm supporting terrorism. Okay, I'll take a taxi, Is that better?