It's something like 70% of American adults are obese, and the rest of them are women on Ally McBeal.

Jesse has opened for me extensively on the road so I’ve seen him do hundreds of sets. He is always super funny, has tons of material and the crowds love him. Bottom line, Jesse Joyce is a great comedian.

We're a spoiled, lazy culture, full of ethnic pride that has to have a parade for every nationality.

All the evidence we need that God is angry with us is Justin Timberlake's career.

It's hard to distinguish when I was actually struggling from when I only felt like I was struggling - which was pretty much always.

The hardest part, for real, is probably when you just don't feel like going on stage and being funny.

Joke stealing is a big deal to me, but I mean, I'm not going to investigate it if it doesn't effect me directly.