Do you know how short you have to be to have a Napoleon complex in North Korea?

You try not to have a favorite when you have sons or kids. Can't have a favorite. Can't let them know know if you do. I don't. I treat my main son and the other two exactly the same way.

There's been so much talk in the news lately about illegal aliens in the workplace. When was the last time an illegal alien stole your job? Oh yeah, that dream job of the Chinese Delivery man pedaling up Broadway delivering Chinese food for 40 cents an hour, or on the back of a landscaping truck with 15 others.

I like when people give up chocolate for Lent. Ooh, just like being nailed to a cross.

Do you know how short you have to be to have a Napoleon complex in North Korea?

Even before the kids are born, you've go to make these decisions. If it's a boy, do we get him circumcised? If it's a girl, do we keep her?

There hasn't been a more effeminate Jew in the closet since Anne Frank.