No one is a natural - you have to work at being a natural.

If Iraq's weapons are weapons of mass destruction, surely ours are weapons of growth and nurturing.

I think comedy should be left up to the professionals, that way everyone's safety is protected.

President Clinton celebrates the first casual Friday at the white house by wearing leather chaps.

White pants should be worn on two occasions: One, never. And two, if you're selling ice cream.

I thought the Egyptians had cured baldness.

I did stand up first in high school, joined an improv group in college, kept doing stand up after that, no one could deter me. And I have no other skills really, so I'm sorta stuck with this now. It's a little late to switch over to an ornithologist.