Those of us who are locked into ineffective expressions of anger suffer as deeply as those of us who dare not get angry at all.

As long as we can feel hope, there is hope.

Women are raised to be the nurturers and steadiers of rocked boats, to hold relationships in place as if our lives depended on it. But it shores up your own dignity and integrity if you're able to say, "There are a million things I love about you, and I want our relationship to continue. I forgive you 95 percent, but not this 5 percent."

Many of our problems with anger occur when we choose between having a relationship and having a self.

Believing that all women should want to be mothers makes about as much sense as believing that all men should want to be engineers.

An intimate relationship is one in which neither party silences, sacrifices, or betrays the self and each party expresses strength and vulnerability, weakness and competence in a balanced way.

Although the connections are not always obvious, personal change is inseparable from social and political change.