What a man calls his 'conscience' is merely the mental action that follows a sentimental reaction after too much wine or love.

The tenderest spot in a man's make-up is sometimes the bald spot on top of his head.

The woman who appeals to a man's vanity may stimulate him, the woman who appeals to his heart may attract him, but it is the woman who appeals to his imagination who gets him.

Marriage is the miracle that transforms a kiss from a pleasure into a duty.

Matrimony is the price of love -- divorce, the rebate.

The dollar sign is the only sign in which the modern man appears to have any real faith.

Don't waste time trying to break a man's heart; be satisfied if you can just manage to chip it in a brand new place.