The dietician is going to get rid of that when he comes in. Although, first, we've got to get a dietician.

I might be in a bit of a Skoda garage rather than a Mercedes garage, but I am telling you some old bangers don't half polish up great.

You can say that strikers are very much like postmen: they have to get in and out as quick as they can before the dog starts to have a go.

It was lucky that the linesman wasn't stood in front of me as I would have poked him with a stick to make sure he was awake.

I've got four women in my house - my wife and my three daughters - and I tell you what, it's pretty scary. I keep my head down and if we're out shopping I try and look in a man's shop while they make their minds up.

My wife runs the house much better than I could so I think she could be a linesman or a referee or even a football manager and that's the truth.

This club needs an impetus of energy - but I just feel tired to be honest. I'm worn out.