I love mixing with comedians when I'm working with them, but when I'm not I don't feel the need to hang around with them.

Make lots of money. Enjoy the work. Operate within the law. Choose any two of three

And people are intrigued if I really am as grumpy in real life. People feel a bit let down if I'm laughing or smiling.

I was so keen to become a comedian that actually doing the comedy itself almost came second.

I tend not to trust people who live in very tidy houses. I know that on the surface there is nothing wrong with a person being well-ordered and disciplined. Nothing, except that it leaves the impression of that person having lived in the confines of a stark institution which, although he or she has long since left, remains within.

People who are pro smacking children say, 'It's the only language they understand.' You could apply that to tourists.

The film industry is like Anne Robinsonalways on the look-out for a new face