I've found that my humor goes over big in London.

Prostitutes go to jail. Their customers go home and read the New York Times. In this country you're allowed to buy anything. If you need a shirt, you have a right to buy it. If you need sex, you don't. What's more important, sex or a shirt?

I've got a friend who is half-Jewish and half-Italian. If he can't buy it wholesale, he steals it!

While I have the utmost respect for people who practice the Christian faith, the fact is, as everyone knows, I am as Jewish as a matzo ball or kosher salami.

By these things examine thyself. By whose rules am I acting; in whose name; in whose strength; in whose glory? What faith, humility, self-denial, and love of God and to man have there been in all my actions?

The key is that I'm always relevant. Some of these comedians have nothing to say. They don't have any ideas so it's "F" this and "F" that. They give you a whole series of swear words and it's really just a way for them to get themselves out of trouble when they can't come up with anything. They're irrelevant and ridiculous.

The New York Times does an unbelievable amount of damage because every day television and radio stations along with the rest of media take their lead on the way the news should be presented along with what actually is the news.