No woman is likely ever to be elected President - they never reach the required legal age.

Junior was being chided for his low grades. Little Robert, who lived a few doors away, was held up as an example. "Robert doesn't get C's and D's does he?" asked his father. "No," Junior admitted, "but he's different. He has very bright parents".

Marriage is like a violin. After the beautiful music is over, the strings are still attached.

A vacation should be just long enough that your boss misses you, and not long enough for him to discover how well he can get along without you.

Most of these love triangles are wrecktangles.

All work and no plagiarism makes a dull speech.

By the time a man can afford to lose a golf ball, he can't hit that far.