Laughter need not be cut out of anything, since it improves everything.

A false or misunderstood word may create as much disaster as a sudden thoughtless act.

I don't believe the writer should know too much where he's going. If he does, he runs into old man blueprint—old man propaganda.

Humor and pathos, tears and laughter are, in the highest expression of human character and achievement, inseparable.

Let me be the first to admit that the naked truth about me is to the naked truth about Salvador Dali as an old ukulele in the attic is to a piano in a tree, and I mean a piano with breasts. Senor Dali has the jump on me from the beginning. He remembers and describes in detail what it was like in the womb. My own earliest memory is of accompanying my father to a polling booth in Columbus, Ohio, where he voted for William McKinley.

I hate women because they have brought into the currency of our language such expressions as "all righty" and "yes indeedy" and hundreds of others.

Women are wiser than men because they know less and understand more.