The guy that designed girls' volleyball uniforms definitely never had daughters.

I'm sure that having acted like an asshole for a great deal of my life, then having played assholes for a good part of my life, created a perception that I'm an asshole.

She's Cherokee Indian, which is great 'cause whenever we have sex, it rains.

I know content-wise I leave nothing to chance. I have no anxiety about what I'm going to do once I'm out on stage.

If you were an actor, anybody could go on Broadway and take a George Carlin hour and do it on stage as a one man show. They're all stand alone essays.

I don't care about anybody's perception of me except for the audience.

There seems to be a weird ceiling to being a stand-up as far as acting.