Oh, wouldn't it be wonderful if some manufacturer would make a toy as tough, as staunch, as hard to crack open as the carton it comes in!

Being divorced is like being hit by a Mack truck. If you live through it, you start looking very carefully to the right and to the left.

I once truly believed that if I had to stand in line for twenty minutes to have a package gift-wrapped it actually gave the recipient more pleasure.

I thought we talked things out!' 'Yes, and you listened very carefully to every word you had to say.

I know what I wish Ralph Nader would investigate next. Marriage. It's not safe, it's not safe at all.

People only call you 'my dear' when they are irritated with you.

The average, healthy, well-adjusted adult gets up at seven-thirty in the morning feeling just plain terrible.