The only reason that they say, 'Women and children first' is to test the strength of the lifeboats.

I know all about improvisation and the free-form that mirrors the chaos of our time, but I do like to feel that the playwright has done some work before I got there.

Years ago when a man began to notice that if he stood up on the subway he was immediately replaced by two people, he figured he was getting too fat.

If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs, it's just possible you haven't grasped the situation.

Being on a ship is something like being pregnant. You can sit there and do absolutely nothing but stare at the water and have the nicest sense that you are accomplishing something.

Now the thing about having a baby - and I can't be the first person to have noticed this - is that thereafter you have it.

I thought we talked things out!' 'Yes, and you listened very carefully to every word you had to say.