I know all about improvisation and the free-form that mirrors the chaos of our time, but I do like to feel that the playwright has done some work before I got there.

Confronted by an absolutely infuriating review, it is sometimes helpful for the victim to do a little personal research on the critic. Is there any truth to the rumor that he had no formal education beyond the age of eleven? In any event, is he able to construct a simple English sentence? Do his participles dangle? When moved to lyricism, does he write "I had a fun time"? Was he ever arrested for burglary? I don't know that you will prove anything this way, but it is perfectly harmless and quite soothing.

Movie actors are just ordinary, mixed-up people - with agents.

I make mistakes; I'll be the second to admit it.

Being on a ship is something like being pregnant. You can sit there and do absolutely nothing but stare at the water and have the nicest sense that you are accomplishing something.

An actor can remember his briefest notice well into senescence and long after he has forgotten his phone number and where he lives.

You can't sleep until noon with the proper elan unless you have some legitimate reason for staying up until three (parties don't count).