I thought that's what happened to women: You live alone when you're old.

I'm really big on hormones.

I'm still hibernating so I get really frustrated with other people's goals and just stop.

Whatever my life looks like, I want it to be real and big and full. I want when, if I get hit by a car, I want to know that I have deep and real friendships, people to visit me in the hospital.

[Congress] can just make [Mitt] Romney president. And we'd be like, "All right, fine."

[Twitter] is not totally where I go anymore to sell myself as a concept, as a comedian, because it moves too fast.

I am just really focused in on what I love doing, but I would be a moron to not take some of my natural talent - I'm not saying I'm that talented, but I have enough acting and writing talent to go.