It's much easier to make jokes about not having kids.

Even if it's L.A. and it's warmer, we're not supposed to be revving up right now. I don't like everyone's energy around [winter] time of year.

I don't like news channels so I have six websites that I check and I get the daily update.

My mother was like, "What did they teach you?", and I had never talked about that [sex-ed] so I freaked out.

If I could make crazy money just doing stand-up, that's what I would do.

I have a new rule where I only follow fashion people on Instagram.

I just remember a creepy sex-ed teacher putting a banana on a condom and then saying, "It goes in the girl if she gets all juicy." We didn't even believe it. We were like, "Well, that's weird."