Writing is something that I've always loved. That stems from my love of being a reader.

In real life, I tend to yell at people a lot. Not because I'm bossy or mean, but because I'm frustrated.

I'm a humor writer, so I don't always present myself in the best light.

As I examine my life through this book, I can't help but wonder if my mother was right. Maybe I really was what I ate. And maybe if she'd let me eat a little more sugar, I'd have come out sweeter.

When I hug her, I notice she's still wearing yesterday's false eyelashes. Mom? You know those come off with a little makeup remover and a cotton pad?" I'm not taking them off." Why not?" I spent $180 on that makeup job and I refuse to wash my face until I get my money's worth.

I'm very detail oriented. I think that's why people enjoy my memoirs - because I tend to remember everything.

I tried, it was hard, I quit, the end. Story of my life.