In real life, I tend to yell at people a lot. Not because I'm bossy or mean, but because I'm frustrated.

Although I get a lot of specialty services like wraps, scrubs, and mustache removal, my favorite is the simple manicure/pedicure. They work on your hands and feet at the same time while you sit in a vibrating chair. I call it the sorority girls version of a threesome.

Fortunately, all it takes for us to be of one mind is some buttercream frosting.

I think people tend to be very myopic and they dont understand how their actions impact others.

Owning a dog is slightly less expensive than being addicted to crack.

I can't believe anyone would voluntarily run 26 miles. Sometimes I sit on the couch cross-legged because I don't feel like walking to the bathroom.

Everyone who reads me is someone I'd like to hang out with.