People often ask why comedy is harder for women, and the reason is because a tampon will sometimes fall out when you're on stage. Blokes don't have that worry.

Anyone who has dead straight hair wants curls.

I can eat a man, but I'm not sure of the fiber content.

For me, being a woman suits what I want to talk about and what my audience wants to hear. Maybe I'm a dying breed.

I don't think I'm successful.

I've got a hat face. My mother always said I've got a hat face

I admire the Elsie Tanners and Barbara Windsors of the world: people who have crawled back from the abyss. I'm quite camp in that respect.