I don't do marriage. I think it's incredibly naff. And I don't like vulgar displays of ostentation.

A good fart joke makes me bawl with laughter, so will somebody farting. And the word 'poo.' You can't beat a good poo joke.

I can eat a man, but I'm not sure of the fiber content.

I still can't set up the ironing-board. A complete Luddite.

I've got this horrible feeling that I'm one of those people who'll always have to flog their guts out to get anywhere.

After graduating from flares and platforms in the early 1970s, I started drama school wearing a pair of khaki dungarees with one of my Dad's Army shirts, accessorised by a cat's basket doubling as a handbag. Very Lady Gaga.

There should be more booing in shops and restaurants and places like that when when the service is bad. If you've had a poor breakfast in a hotel, you should put your knife and fork down and boo.