You might as well like yourself; just think about all the time you're gonna have to spend with you.

When I was onstage doing the work, adrenaline killed the pain because I never hurt in front of an audience.

You might as well like yourself; just think about all the time you're gonna have to spend with you.

I have some very personal feelings about politics, but I don't get into it because I do comedy already.

Don't you understand how dramatic it is to be a comic? To be a fool, to get people to laugh at this show-off? Milton Berle could take Laurence Olivier and stick him under the table if he wanted to. And so could I.

I've had the greatest respect for my work in this country by Americans. Critics have no brains.

You may catch more flies with honey than vinegar, but you'll get them to work harder if you use a flyswatter.