The day you're born, you get the pink slip on YOU. Outright ownership. You must only share that life with those that you and only you choose.

The young man who's had the Guggenheim fortune behind him all his life - he can hire all the authorities on the subject to teach him how to do a monologue, but he's never going to have the right stuff to pull it off. If he doesn't walk out onstage needing to walk out there, he doesn't have a dream of doing well.

You may catch more flies with honey than vinegar, but you'll get them to work harder if you use a flyswatter.

When I was a kid, I said to my father one afternoon, 'Daddy, will you take me to the zoo?' He answered, 'If the zoo wants you, let them come and get you.

Don't give me paper - I can get the same lawyer who drew it up to break it. But if you shake my hand, that's for life.

If I found the cure for dystrophy tomorrow, I would do a telethon in four weeks for acute pain that in this country is a bigger problem than cancer, heart, sickle cell, anemia, name it. It is - it's hitting 70 million Americans.

Every man's dream is to be able to sink into the arms of a woman without also falling into her hands.