The day you're born, you get the pink slip on YOU. Outright ownership. You must only share that life with those that you and only you choose.

If you think childlike, you'll stay young. If you keep your energy going, and do everything with a little flair, you're gunna stay young. But most people do things without energy, and they atrophy their mind as well as their body. You have to think young, you have to laugh a lot, and you have to have good feelings for everyone in the world, because if you don't, it's going to come inside, your own poison, and it's over.

I turned down 'Some Like It Hot.' See how smart I am? I felt I couldn't bring anything funny to it. The outfit was funny. I don't need to compete with the wardrobe.

The day you're born, you get the pink slip on YOU. Outright ownership. You must only share that life with those that you and only you choose.

I don't want to be remembered. I want the nice words when I can hear them.

From 1936 on, I have taken more falls than any other 20 comedians put together. From the time I was 21, I've taken them on everything from clay courts to cement to wood floors, coming off pianos, going out a two-story window, landing on Dean, falling into the rough. You do that and you're gonna have problems.

If you're an old pro, you know how well you're doing when you're doing it, and your inner government spanks you if you're not doing well.