Most people, you do a TV series, it ends three, four, five years later; it's a relic.

On the side of box of my superman costume it actually said - 'Do not attempt to fly!'

My parents didn't want to move to Florida, but they turned sixty and that's the law.

Why is McDonalds still counting? How insecure is this company? 40 million, 80 billion million jillion killion tillion... who cares? Is anyone really impressed by that any more? Ooh, 89 billion sold? All right, I'll have one! I'm satisfied! I'd like to tell the CEO of McDonalds, "Look. We all get it, okay? You've sold a lot of hamburgers. Whatever the number is, just put up a sign, 'McDonalds: We're Doing Very Well.' We are tired of hearing about every goddamn one of them."

A recent survey stated that the average person's greatest fear is having to give a speech in public. Somehow this ranked even higher than death which was third on the list. So, you're telling me that at a funeral, most people would rather be the guy in the coffin than have to stand up and give a eulogy.

You can tell what was the best year of your father's life, because they seem to freeze that clothing style and ride it out.

I'm old, I'm rich and I'm tired.