When you're through with your cat, you can't throw it in the trash.

There is never a need to outrun anything you can outwit.

Nothing spoils lunch any quicker than a rogue meatball rampaging through your spaghetti.

I thought you were dead, Mr. McCandles.

Jon: Our only thought is to entertain you! Garfield: Feed me.

I probably get more inspiration for human stories and idiosyncrasies than I do animal stories.

My dream in life is to write the one gag that makes everyone in the world laugh.