In the end, the type of parent you are is going to be something that you carry with you. ... Having multiple kids, it's been a gift in a way. It's keeping the priorities straighter.

I'm definitely hesitant wearing shorts during the summer. Like for a pale person, you know, summer - everyone in the world is so excited for summer, but pale people, we're just like, oh no.

My favorite vegetable is the marshmallow.

I should clarify that anyone that goes onstage and makes strangers laugh is insane. So I am insane.

How dumb do I think the Americans are? I bet you we could sell those idiots water.

You think when gym teachers were younger, they're thinking, "You know, I want to teach...but I don't want to read. How about kickball for 40 years?"

Ironically, to my children, bedtime is a punishment that violates their basic rights as human beings.