Thanksgiving. It's like we didn't even try to come up with a tradition. The tradition is, we overeat. 'Hey, how about at Thanksgiving we just eat a lot?' 'But we do that every day!' 'Oh. What if we eat a lot with people that annoy the hell out of us?'

I would say I'm - in the show, I'm a cultural Catholic, which is what I was.

Other people's children's birthday parties are the most joyful events you will ever resent having to attend.

“Really, there are two types of people who go bowling. There are people who really, really love bowling. Then there are the people that are like: wouldn’t it be hysterical if we went bowling?”

The question is the primary form of communication for little kids.

The DC Improv food is amazingly edible for a comedy club.

I've always wanted to be an actor. I've never planned on the acting and the stand-up feeding each other; they've always been separate desires.