It's not as if ten years ago, we were like, 'I wish I could take low quality photos of my dessert.'
Jim GaffiganNow don't get me wrong, I love animals, but I like eatin' 'em more... fun to pet, better to chew.
Jim GaffiganMy kids are always awake. It's they're taking shifts. 'Alright, I'll annoy 'em from midnight to . Who wants to ?'
Jim GaffiganI feel guilty if I'm not reading books, but I read scripts of movies or things that I know I'm committed to that I'm going to do the project. I tell myself, "I'm going to read this script like six times," and I only read it the initial time.
Jim GaffiganI was watching Animal Planet. Did you know that the male seahorse has the baby? And I was thinking, "Why don't they just call that the female seahorse?" You know it's just some stubborn scientist. "Yeah, that one there's the male seahorse." And his assistant's like, "Uh, Bill, that one's having a baby." ... "The male has the baby. You're fired."
Jim Gaffigan