I believe that comedians do what they do, and then they get credit or criticism for doing it. There's nothing planned about this.

I don't understand the fashion industry and the appeal of it. I understand that there are some people who think it's important to them, and they're designers, they're artists, but there seems to be a disproportionate amount of our culture that's caught up in that and the red carpet stuff. It seems like there's a disproportionate amount of attention placed on that.

I'm bald, blind and pale. I'm like a gigantic recessive gene.

I was able to make the jump to theaters without having a TV show. My passion for getting a TV show just plummeted. It was like I had already achieved what I wanted to achieve.

Whenever you go out to eat you gotta get the appetizer. 'Cause the appetizer's just an excuse for an extra meal. You're always like "Lets see, I will start with the 80 buffalo wings...and do you have a low-cal blue cheese? 'Cause I don't wanna fill up too much."

I don't know what's more exhausting about parenting: the getting up early, or acting like you know what you're doing.

I was looking at a bottle of water; they have nutritional facts printed on the side. You know, I'm no chemist, but I have a rough idea what's in water.