People get burned out in big families, you can even see it in the naming of children. Like the first kid, "You were named after Grandma." The seventh kid, "You were named after a sandwich I had. Now get your brother, Reuben."

That's not to say that I'm a well-informed Catholic. I'm still in idiot.

All I want to do is be a good dad, but I'm pretty bad at it.

I am originally from Indiana. I know what most of you are thinking: Indiana - mafia.

Sometimes being lazy can get you in trouble. You ever not take a shower all weekend, just lounge around, then you're running late for work on Monday? There's always one person at work: "Something smells like smoke in here!" "Uh, I went to a barbeque on Friday night. Only had 48 hours to take a shower. Busy."

I've always wanted to be an actor. I've never planned on the acting and the stand-up feeding each other; they've always been separate desires.

I smoke crack. I get all my dancers together and we do a prayer.