Holidays are also an opportunity for kids to unlearn every good habit they've learned during the rest of the year. They don't go to school. They get to stay up past their bedtime. They get candy and presents for doing nothing. Childhood utopia.

I think what Pope Francis is saying is that nobody's perfect, you know? And so someone like Joe Biden, you know, where - you know, when he was running for president, people were - there were some bishops that were like don't let him have the Eucharist. And Pope Francis is saying that's not the point of this.

Now that I'm married and have two beautiful children, it really makes me appreciate... being alone.

I think I grew up with the idea that God was a punishing being, constructed around rules.

Oh. What if we eat a lot with people that annoy the hell out of us?

The appetizer is just an excuse for an extra meal. Let's see, I will start with the eighty buffalo wings.

I don't know what's more exhausting about parenting: the getting up early, or acting like you know what you're doing.