There were times in my life when I had one thing to do all day, but I still couldn’t get to it. “I gotta go to the post office, but I’d probably have to put on pants. And they’re only open till five. Looks like I’m going to have to do that next week.

There's something that's really fun about the challenge of making the mundane funny, too, I think.

Some people have their own bowling ball and their own bowling shoes... and no friends.

Some of my fear and anxieties surrounding faith, I think, provides some good comedy for my act.

Bacon bits are like the fairy dust of the food community.

I don't want to get involved in the culture war. Religion's iffy.

I'm kind of like a guy who's missing a little bit of the guy gene. Like, I love steak, but the notion of golfing is the last thing I would want to do. I love women, but I'm also a mama's boy, and some of my best friends are women. So I'm kinda half guy's guy.