My children have made me a better man, which is - in the end, that's probably more important than two more comedy specials or being in better shape.

Most single guys I know think fatherhood is terrifying.

I know that Colbert could quote Thomas Aquinas and all this, but I'm somebody who, because it's a necessity for me on a personal basis. I need it because I'm a lunatic.

There should be a children's song: 'If you're happy and you know it, keep it to yourself and let your dad sleep'.

Comedians kind of write what comes to them. You can give yourself little assignments, but it's what inspires you. So I feel like with food, it is a passion of mine. It's where my sensibility rests. I love topics that are universal, and I love stuff that doesn't alienate people.

I think what Pope Francis is saying is that nobody's perfect, you know? And so someone like Joe Biden, you know, where - you know, when he was running for president, people were - there were some bishops that were like don't let him have the Eucharist. And Pope Francis is saying that's not the point of this.

I think I grew up with the idea that God was a punishing being, constructed around rules.