Without Valentine's Day, February would be... well, January.

I'm not a strict vegetarian. I do eat beef and pork. And chicken. But not fish 'cause that's disgusting! How do you know when fish goes bad? It smells like fish either way! 'Hey this smells like a dumpster, lets eat it!'

I would make sweet love to Don Rickles.

Playing frisbee with a five year old is amazingly similar to chasing after a frisbee.

I grew up 45 minutes outside of Chicago.

You can't tell me the success of Kevin Bacon isn't somehow tied to his name. You're not going out to see a Kevin Hot-Dog movie.

Actually, the reason I look like this is because my father was from Sweden and my mother was Elton John.