The Italians always made good wine, but you had the impression they were friendly guys in straw hats running family vineyards with slaves or something so that the vino was never more than ten bucks a bottle.

If you hate what you're seeing, you call it sex and violence. If you like it, you call it "romance and adventure."

Faith is like a kernel of wheat.

Apparently we love our own cell phones but we hate everyone else's.

You're not a real Texan till you've been kicked out of every decent state in America.

Discourse is fleeting, but junk mail is forever.

There is no post-9/11. Everything from now until the end of time is post-9/11.