Pie throwing is kind of a lost art, and although it may be a rather rudimentary, burlesque humor, there's something inherently funny about taking a pie in the face, under the right conditions.

Adults ask questions as a child does. When you stop wondering, you might as well put your rocker on the front porch and call it a day.

Pie throwing is kind of a lost art, and although it may be a rather rudimentary, burlesque humor, there's something inherently funny about taking a pie in the face, under the right conditions.

There are very few Japanese Jews. As a result, there is no Japanese word for Alan King.

Happiness is being served with a paternity suit on your 75th birthday.

There's only one critic whose opinion I really value, in the final analysis: Johnny Carson. I have never needed any entourage standing around bolstering my ego. I'm secure. I know exactly who and what I am. I don't need to be told. I make no apologies for being the way I am.

Money gives me just one big thing that's really important, and that's the freedom of not having to worry about money.