The worst gift is a fruitcake. There is only one fruitcake in the entire world, and people keep sending it to each other.

He's so fat, he can be his own running mate.

Money gives me just one big thing that's really important, and that's the freedom of not having to worry about money.

I loved the towns I grew up in as a boy, and after I became a celebrity, I went back several times. I would have had the time of my life seeing the old places and the old faces again, but the attitude of those same people was, "I guess you're so big we bore you now."

I work because I enjoy what I'm doing, and the fact that I make money at it - big money - is a fine-and-dandy side fact.

I've worked ever since I was a kid with a two-bit kit of magic tricks trying to improve my skills at entertaining whatever public I had - and to make myself ready, whenever the breaks came, to entertain a wider and more demanding public.

Nancy Reagan fell down and broke her hair.