Do you know my dream? I really want to become an aluminum-siding salesman.

People will pay more to be entertained than educated.

The good news is that the president gets another chance. The bad news is that he'll be two weeks older.

I never analyze it. Analyzing it would just be a waste of time. I just go out and do it.

Entertainment is like any other major industry; it's cold, big business. The business end wants to know one thing: Can you do the job? If you can, you're in, you're made; if you can't, you're out.

Happiness is.....finding two olives in your martini when youre hungry.

If it weren't for Philo T. Farnsworth, inventor of television, we'd still be eating frozen radio dinners.