When the public starts classifying you as thoughtful, someone given to serious issues, you find yourself declassified as a humorist.

It's silly to have as one's sole object in life just making money, accumulating wealth. I work because I enjoy what I'm doing, and the fact that I make money at it - big money - is a fine-and-dandy side fact. Money gives me just one big thing that's really important, and that's the freedom of not having to worry about money. I'm concerned about values - moral, ethical, human values - my own, other people's, the country's, the world's values. Having money now gives me the freedom to worry about the things that really matter.

I don't think it's you that changes with success - it's the people around you who change. Because of your new status, they change in relation to you.

The Hollywood tradition I like best is called sucking up to the stars.

Happiness is being served with a paternity suit on your 75th birthday.

People are hypocrites. If you ask them what they want to see on TV, they'll tell you they want better quality programming. And then what do they watch? 'Gilligan's Island.'

You become successful, the way I see it, only if you're good enough to deliver what the public enjoys. If you're not, you won't have any audience; so the performer really has more to do with his success than the public does.