Happiness is being stuck in an elevator and discovering the ravishing blonde with you is a liquor salesman with a case of samples.

We're more effective than birth control pills.

The only issue cash presents you is the independence of not stressing about funds.

Never continue in a job you don't enjoy. If you're happy in what you're doing, you'll like yourself, you'll have inner peace. And if you have that, along with physical health, you will have had more success than you could possibly have imagined.

There was this billy goat at a movie studio who found and ate a can of film. When a nanny asked him how he liked it, he said, "It was all right but I liked the book better."

That would have been a great ticket, Reagan and Ford - an actor and a stuntman.

A two-pound turkey and a fifty-pound cranberry-that's Thanksgiving dinner at Three Mile Island.