[Hugh Jackman is] an Adamantium-laced Fred Astaire.

The Supreme Court ruled that disabled golfer Casey Martin has a legal right to ride in a golf cart between shots at PGA Tour events. Man, the next thing you know, they're going to have some guy carry his clubs around for him.

The reason I don’t worry about society is, nineteen people knocked down two buildings and killed thousands. Hundreds of people ran into those buildings to save them. I’ll take those odds every f*cking day.

That's the Senate Ethics Committee, an oxymoron since 1973.

Megachurches. I can't be the only one frightened when our houses of worship sound like they could take on Godzilla.

Donald Rumsfeld. Love him or hate him, you've gotta admit: a lot of people hate him.

I don't trust any country that looks around a continent and says, "Hey, I'll take the frozen part."