Yon Kippur. Greatest Jewish holiday ever. The Jewish day of attonement. You don't ear for one day, all your sins for the year are wiped clean. Beat that with your little Lent. What is Lent? Forty days of absolution. Forty days to one day. Even in sin you're paying retail.

What I like to do is come in, write the entire program and treat my staff to hot stone massages.

If we are going to amend the constitution, shouldn't it be to keep the omos-hay from arrying-may?

With the situation in Iraq growing ever more dangerous, the 34-member Coalition of The Willing are, one by one, dropping out to join the other coalition known as Most of The Rest of The World.

Child: Why on this night do we eat Hot Fudge Sundaes? Adult: To remind us that being Jewish is like having your birthday every day!! Plus they're delicious!

When you think about it, Alaska is also near the North Pole, so she must also be friends with Santa.

Congress, the legislative stone in America's urethra.