Please explain to me why John Kerry sounds more dickish telling the truth than Bush sounds when he's lying. How is that possible?
Jon StewartI don't think, if anything, I don't think it's a feeling of hopelessness that people feel. I think if they feel - if they're feeling what we're feeling, it's that this is how we fight back.
Jon Stewart[If President Bush is right about democracy in Iraq] I may, and I don't know if I can physically do this, implode.
Jon StewartPresident Bush delivered his first State of the Union address, riding high on an 82-percent approval rating, and with Attorney General John Ashcroft dispatching agents to interview the other 18 percent.
Jon StewartPeople would like to place a standard on our show that doesn't exist. We're not set up for reporting; we don't have an apparatus for that. We're discussing things that hopefully people might get something out of, but it's wildly inconsistent. Just because we hit on points that resonate, or people think are real complaints - that doesn't make us journalists.
Jon Stewart