War that hasn't affected us here, in the way that you would imagine a five-year war would affect a country.

So if you're negative, you live longer? That sounds like a cruel joke.

If it turns out that President Barack Obama can make a deal with the most intransigent, hard-line, unreasonable, totalitarian mullahs in the world but not with Republicans? Maybe he's not the problem.

I thought we were out of money!? You can't simultaneously fire teachers AND tomahawk missiles.

Alright guys, I want to get out there and vote tomorrow. And not because it's cool, because it's not. You know what is cool? Smoking. Smoke while you vote.

Bush proposed a constitutional amendment to ban gay marriage. Some saw the move as an attempt to preserve traditional values, while others saw it as a cynical ploy to ensure that Vice President... Cheney will never have to pay for his gay daughter's wedding.

Is listening to Pink Floyd in the dark a medical condition?