You know, I just want to say to her (Sarah Palin), just very quickly...F-- you.

I like a lot of wheels. If I could have eight wheels, I would.

I could never wrap my head around why the world and the President that Republicans describe bears so little resemblance to the world and the President that I experience. And now I know why. There is a President Obama that only Republicans can see.

I think people are used to people in show business having a lot of hubris. I think I have a normal amount of self-loathing but because I'm in show business it's considered self-deprecation. In normal life I would just be considered your average neurotic.

You're your own play.

We don't consider ourselves equal opportunity anythings, because that's not - you know, that's the beauty of fake journalism. We don't have to - we travel in fake ethics.

I have great respect for people who are in the front lines and the trenches of trying to enact social change. I am far lazier than that.