The danger of oppression is not just being oppressed, it's becoming an oppressor.

As long as I don't end up hosting a skin care commercial with Cher, I'm happy.

No matter what your race, creed or sexual preference, there is a word that people use to describe you that is very nasty. It's what we all have in common. That, and masturbation.

I have complete faith in the continued absurdity of whatever’s going on.

If you are a minority or an interest group, the Democrats will hold the debate at your house. Whereas Republicans take a slightly different approach: they have a big tent - you're just not allowed in it.

If America leads a blessed life, then why did God put all of our oil under people who hate us?

I could never wrap my head around why the world and the President that Republicans describe bears so little resemblance to the world and the President that I experience. And now I know why. There is a President Obama that only Republicans can see.