Do you know how many movies I wrote when I was high?

In South Carolina, Senator John Edwards won handily, fulfilling his promise to win every state he was born in.

Analysis of President Bush's tax plan has revealed that several elaborate tricks and gimmicks were used to make it look like a $1.35 trillion cut, but in reality it's going to be closer to costing $1.8 trillion. Critics claim it's math so fuzzy, you have to squint to see our nation's future of subsistence farming and post-apocalyptic roving motorcycle gangs.

They create these rules and argue about things we don't even understand. It is like watching soccer. You sit there and you're sort of amused, but most of the time you're thinking, pick up the ball! That's what you're thinking.

The Rapture: The ultimate Republican back-up plan.

Being funny in life is a lot more like judo. It's using the energy.

You have to remember one thing about the will of the people: it wasn't that long ago that we were swept away by the Macarena.