A witty writer is like a porcupine; his quill makes no distinction between friend and foe.

Experience is a grindstone; and it is lucky for us, if we can get brightened by it, and not ground.

If a man should happen to reach perfection in this world, he would have to die immediately to enjoy himself.

The best medicine I know for rheumatism is to thank the Lord that it ain't gout.

There are only two qualities in the world: efficiency and inefficiency; and only two sorts of people: the efficient and the inefficient.

Most men would rather be charged with malice than with making a blunder.

Common sense is instinct, and enough of it is genius.