Why do born-again people so often make you wish they'd never been born the first time?

Find out what you like doing best, and get someone to pay you for it.

Spring makes everything look filthy.

[On Malcolm Muggeridge:] He thinks he was knocked off his horse by God, like St. Paul on the road to Damascus. His critics think he simply fell off it from old age.

In our society mothers take the place elsewhere occupied by the Fates, the System, Negroes, Communism or Reactionary Imperialist Plots; mothers go on getting blamed until they're eighty, but shouldn't take it personally.

Things a mother should know: how to comfort a son without exactly saying Daddy was wrong.

A good listener is not someone with nothing to say. A good listener is a good talker with a sore throat.