From a commercial point of view, if Christmas did not exist it would be necessary to invent it.

Hats divide generally into three classes: offensive hats, defensive hats, and shrapnel.

Americans, indeed, often seem to be so overwhelmed by their children that they'll do anything for them except stay married to the co-producer.

In our society mothers take the place elsewhere occupied by the Fates, the System, Negroes, Communism or Reactionary Imperialist Plots; mothers go on getting blamed until they're eighty, but shouldn't take it personally.

Being young is not having any money; being young is not minding not having any money.

Children and zip fasteners do not respond to force ... except occasionally.

I suppose we all share this pipe-dream of being able to reach out a hand and find anything at will; what is amazing is that we think that good filing could somehow make it comes true. On the contrary: putting a letter into a filing system is like releasing your ferret in the Hampton Court maze.